What Is It With Women And Wheels?

[Guest scrabster]

hi all,as the title says,what a day today.7.30am went to set of to work,daughters car blocking me in with flat back tyre.changed that for her.dinner time her indoors phoned me,she cant blow up youngest daughters bike tyres(cycle proficiency test today) poped home to do that,only 2 mins from work.got home 5pm house is empty,missus phones 5.30pm shes at sports store in a panick,the car went bang when she got in it.went to the rescue and couldnt find her so i rang her mobile.she rants down the phone outside the bloody sports store.theres no sports store here i said.oh ........ive told you the wrong retail park,the one shes at is about 4 miles away.got there and the front offside spring is broken but i managed to limp it home.now she has no car till the weekend.well she would have if she didnt have declared her mx 5 sorn and surrender the tax last week because of the crap weather.then she says oops the mot ran out last week on the polo (broken spring car) i phoned daughter with puncture this morning asking if she had it repaired,she had but hit a pot hole on the way back and blew a hole in the nearside rear compleatly trashing the tyre so back on with the space saver and a new tyre later she made it back home.i told her to pick her mum up for work, they both work at asda on nightshift,she forgot.so now the missus has walked to work i can type all of this out.

jess.

[Guest combatsapph]

Well, at least you know what to get them for Christmas.

 

Two bus passes!

[Guest Kieran]

I was once working about 200 miles away from home and my wife phoned me up from home to ask what the registration number of her car was.

 

I pointed out that if she looked out of the window onto the drive, she would probably see for herself......

[fry61]

Some of the above problems must be due to incorrect or lack of training!!

[Knock-on]

You can get them trained.

 

Bloody heck... and there's me just ignoring her all these years

 

However, there IS hope.

 

Print this off for you nearest and dearest as a special treat. The woman of your life will be overjoyed at your thought and kindness. As a special treat, you may like to get it made into a Ironing Board cover for her birthday.

 

1. Silence, the Final frontier: Where no woman has gone before.

 

2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits

 

3. Combating the Imelda Marcos Syndrome: You do not need new shoes

every'day.

 

4. Parties: Going without new outfits

 

5. Man Management: Discover how minor household chores can wait

until after'the game.

 

6. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men need space in the bathroom cabinet

too.

 

7. Bathroom Etiquette II: His razor is His.

 

8. Valuation: Just because it's not important to you...

 

9. Communication Skills I: Tears - The last resort, not the first

 

10. Communication Skills II: Thinking before speaking

 

11. Communications Skills III: Getting what you want, without

nagging

 

12. Driving a car safely; A skill you can acquire

 

13. Party Etiquette: Drinking your fair share

 

14. Telephone Skills: How to hang up

 

15. Introduction to parking

 

16. Advanced parking: Reversing into a space

 

17. Overcoming anal retentive behaviour: Leaving the towels on the

floor

 

18. Water retention: fact or fat?

 

19. Cooking I: Bringing back bacon, eggs & butter

 

20. Cooking II: Bran & Tofu aren't for human consumption

 

21. Cooking III: How not to inflict your diets on other people

 

22. Compliments; Accepting them gracefully

 

23. PMT; Your problem...Not his

 

24. Dancing; Why men don't want to

 

25. Sex; It's for married couples too

 

26. Classic Clothing: Wearing outfits you already have

 

27. Household Dust: A harmless natural occurrence only women

notice

 

28. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing it all together

 

29. Ballet: for women only

 

30. Oil & Petrol: Your car needs both

 

31. Learning to go in public toilets

 

32. Appreciating the humour of the three stooges

 

33. "Do these jeans make my arse look big?" - Why men lie

 

34. TV Remotes: For men only."