Lipstick

[Guest vacinc]

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

 

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

 

There are teachers, and then there are educators... and another/////

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.

 

The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

 

Lawyer: Have you any grounds?

Man: Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.

 

Lawyer: No, I mean what is the foundation of this case.

Man: It made of concrete.

 

Lawyer: I don't think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?

Man: No, we have carport, and not need one.

 

Lawyer: I mean. What are your relations like?

Man: All my relations still in Poland.

 

Lawyer: Is there any infidelity in your marriage?

Man: We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.

 

Lawyer: Does your wife beat you up?

Man: No, I always up before her.

 

Lawyer: Is your wife a nagger?

Man: No, she white.

 

Lawyer: Why do you want this divorce?

Man: She is going to kill me.

 

Lawyer: What makes you think that?

Man: I got proof.

 

Lawyer: What kind of proof?

 

Man: She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say: "Polish Remover."

Edited November 11, 2006 by vacinc