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  1. ivan the terrible


    as you may have read in the hollowell report we broke down again, mark b and shaft came to our rescue but couldn't get us going, this was at 6,20pm on Saturday night, so I called the AA , told them what was wrong that the ignition coil had gone and unless one of there guys had one on their van we would need a recovery truck to get, us ,the kit and a trailer all home, ok the man says will put you on priority will be sorted within the hour, couldn't have been more wrong!!!!!!!! CALLED THEM OUT AT 6.30pm AND WE WERE HOME AT 10.10 THE NEXT F#####G MORNING!!!!!!! NEARLY 16 HOURS!!!!! UNBELIEVABLE. The itinerary of our nightmare as follows. 6:30 called AA told by lying barstewards would be an hour, 6 1/2 hours later following several calls truck arrived, luckily we had been camping so we had chairs to sit on and blanket to keep warm, and for the first 4 hour a sense of humour. anyway despite telling AA that we had a trailer the F***ing idiots sent a lorry that couldn't tow, and wouldn't fit on trailer. like queen Vic we were not amused. 1/2 hour later another truck came and towed us to a "safe place" 1/2 mile away. now excuse my French but we thought we were going home not to a "safe place" the w*****r dumped us on a laybye on the edge of the f****ing, B*******d, W******g, C******g A14 in the dark where to my mind we could have been killed, accosted, mugged, raped, buggered or even cuddled by SHAFT by surprise and from behind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, we spent 2 F*******g hours there in fear of all of the above. The AA arrived again 2 hour later and loaded us up after asking how we were, f******g P*****d off you A**** F*******g T*t W********r was our response. he then shared the exciting news that he was only taking us to Trowell services which was met with a smile and thanks for nothing you C*** S******G A**** Bandit. to which he replied he dint give a s***t he was retiring soon anyway W******r!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. we arrived at trowel at 4:50AM. went for a coffee n something to eat (we hadn't eaten since 1pm the previous day) anyway I fancied crumpet after having sausage all weekend. would you f******g believe it no crumpet, that was me done hysterical, hungry, tired, not a glass of red in sight for at least 12 hours and still scared that SHAFT was somewhere lurking ready to ponce. any way fell asleep on table in services for another 2 hours and would you T*****g believe it the 2 of the hairy a*****d t*****s turned up at the same time (just like buses) anyway got home around 10ish feeling refreshed, revitalised and ready to go to my friends wedding *******NOT*********. in summary the AA are a bunch of T*t sucking A***e munching C***k banging anally retarded bunch of lying tosspots. I apologise if any body is an AA man within the club or if you have a close family member who is , I'm sure that you are not any of the previously described.i also apologis to anybody else who my foul langage , apauling spelling and bad grammer may have offended. I am obviously still distressed and mentally affected by our ordeal and may consider therapy if the next glass of red doesn't help. thanks for listening, ANDREA(wife of ivan the terrible) xxxx
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